HONORABLE MENTIONS: Redwood, Palm, Mango, Pecan, Sweetgum
10. Hickory
- Old Hickory. Hickory Dickory Dock. The Hickory Strikes at Midnight. Hickory makes it this high purely on the sound of its name.
9. Joshua
- Joshua trees – invented in the 80s by famous botanist U2 – stormed the tree scene before settling into their spot at #9.
8. Butternut
- Butternut is the #8 funniest tree, but the #1 tree to shout in place of an expletive.
7. Sycamore
- This is a sycamore:
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
6. Hemlock
- Socrates was a known downer. Any tree that can take him down is alright in my book.
5. Tupelo
- TOO-puh-low. I don’t know a single other thing about this type of tree, but for a few years when I was younger, I thought that Follow Me was a song by Uncle Tupelo and not Uncle Kracker. This isn’t really going anywhere, so…
4. Magnolia
- Magnolia trees conjure up the image of a Southern plantation, Colonel Sanders, and belles with “a case of the vapors”.
3. Spruce
- Don’t bring me down, Spruce! Spruce trees get an added bonus for being the favorite tree of standup comic Emo Philips.
2. Sassafras
- Nothing says sass like sassafras! Sassafras was voted the tree least willing to participate in a trust fall.
1. Sequoia
- They’re dummy thick. They’re from California. And they were named for the inventor the the Cherokee syllabary. And that, friends, is comedy gold.
Hugo Hunting 